Part 1
CHAPTER I
Not God, not man, but the devil
Many people still didn't believe that war was so imminent. Many still comforted themselves with the thought that in the very last moment a catastrophe would be avoided; that it is merely a political struggle which would somehow be settled before the world would become immersed in war. Nevertheless, the tension could be felt in the air. The danger was almost palpable. Hitler was making fiery hate speeches, threatening total war if he would not be granted his desires. The Polish Chief of the Army, Rydz-Smigly, fiercely proclaimed that "even a button from my uniform I will not relinquish," that he is ready for the struggle to defend his homeland. The raving of hundreds of thousands of aroused followers of the F¸hrer could be loudly heard shouting ceaselessly: Sieg Heil!
During the last days of August, 1939, it was already felt that war is unavoidable. Every day the newspapers announced alarming news with large headlines across the front page that a storm is approaching. Hitler's voice could be heard thundering on radio, threatening to annihilate anyone who would oppose him as he marched on his way to reach his aim. All diplomatic intervention, such as that of Chamberlain of England and Daladier of France, did not help. It appeared that the lion had freed himself from the chain and could no longer be held in check.
The Polish army mobilized all its troops, calling up all its reservists to organize the opposition. Young people with knapsacks could be seen everywhere, gathering at assembly points. At night blackouts were rehearsed. The city was enveloped in darkness. Commandos of the Air Force came around, checking if everyone was following the blackout instructions. Reflectors lit up the sky, searching for enemy planes over Polish territory. The youth were amused by this spectacle. The August nights were mild. In the air was the scent of ripe fruit and abundant fields. Boys and girls went about in the streets laughing, without worry and amused themselves in the darkness and alarm drills. They cast their eyes upwards to listen to the roar of the steel birds which patrolled the sky. It all appeared like a joke. It was called alarm preparedness for any eventuality, though it would not be needed.
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Jews, who are generally very aware of danger, immediately felt the danger of the moment. Trouble could be sensed. Wealthy Jews immediately acquired passports. Others sent money out of the country so that they would have means to survive, should they have to wander. The poor tried to console themselves that these were only idle threats to scare the masses; that at the last moment a miracle would occur. There were also "strategists" who calculated that Hitler was incapable of waging war because he is unprepared; that the whole world would oppose him; that his tanks and cannons are made of plastic; that it was all swindle and bluff. In the cafÈs, discussions took place amidst joking and laughter throughout the crowd.
I escape from the border
During the last years before World War II, I lived and worked in Sosnowiec, an industrial city in Poland, a mere seven kilometers from Katowice, the capital of Oberschlesien. We were very close to the German border where Hitler had mobilized his troops, so it was expected that the first battle would take place here. Whoever had the possibility ran away to the hinterland in order to be as far away as possible from the line of fire. Even those who did not believe that there would be a war also wanted to be as far as possible from the border until the threat would pass. I myself also entertained this idea for two reasons: First of all, I wanted to be as far away as possible from the German border because even if the chance of only minor incidents occurring existed, it was wiser to be farther away. Secondly, at such a critical time I wanted to be near my mother who was living by herself in Ostrowiec. True, she was living with her family--her mother, a brother and nieces and other relatives, but none of her children were with her, so I, who was at that time unmarried, should be at my mother's side at such a critical time. As soon as I made my decision, I went to the station, purchased a ticket, and Wednesday, August 30, 1939, departed by train from Sosnowiec to Kielce and from there with another train to Ostrowiec. As I later discovered, that was the last civilian train to leave Sosnowiec. Already, at the train station, I felt the high tension in the air. Nervous military men were around, reservists, recruits and nurses who were hurrying to their garrisons. The speedy train passed by various stations very quickly, not pausing, as though there was no time. Everywhere one beheld the same scenes. Confused people were running back and forth, shoving one another, hurrying. Everyone had fear in their eyes. In Skarzysko, where I had to transfer, I could only manage with great difficulty to get into a regular coach train because it was full of army personnel. I squeezed in amongst the sweaty bodies. One could smell the strong odours of sweat and whisky. Many drunken voices could be heard all around singing some sort of military songs but without any rhythm. These were a variety of compositions, some of which were melancholic, full of longing. All this blended with the noise of the wheels and the steaming of the engine which wended its way through the thick Polish forests and endless plains. The train continued on its way urgently through the sunken-in-sleep villages, leaving an echo of military marches and the unsettling whistle of the locomotive which the wind carried through the neighbouring fields and forests.
Late at night I arrived at the Ostrowiec station. I could barely manage to squeeze my way out with my valise. In the darkness of night the coachman, Yosel Kabaleh, recognized me. He grabbed the valise from me, pushed me into a packed wagon and brought me to the sleeping city. My mother, frightened and trembling, hearing my voice, opened the door and rejoiced at the sight of me, as though God Himself had sent an angel to her. She would at least have one child beside her so that she would not feel so lonely during such dreadful days. I felt that I had instilled a new spirit in my mother. I recalled that long ago, when I was a young child, I would cuddle up in this way, with my mother, seeking her protection when there would be thunder and lightening outside.
CHAPTER 2
My first contact with the shtetl
When, on the following day, Thursday, people saw me in the village, they looked at me wonderingly. I used to come sometimes to the shtetl for Passover and sometimes for the High Holidays, but they could not understand what I was doing there on an ordinary Thursday. What had happened? They started to interrogate me, to question me: "Is it true that there is already fear at the border?" Since I just came from the border, they assumed that I must know. When I went out in the street I could see, in the distance, how my mother was explaining my sudden appearance to the neighbours.
My first visit was to the Jewish cemetery to the grave of my father, of blessed memory. This was beside the home of the Ostrowiec rebbe, Reb Maier Yechiel Halevi, of blessed memory. While I was praying at the grave site, a cool wind blew and the branches of the trees swayed religiously as though they were saying prayers together with me. I exited the cemetery comforted, feeling as though I had fulfilled a holy obligation upon which my destiny depended.
Outside, Jews came to greet me, to say Shalom Aleichem, as though wanting to prove that I am truly present. The news of my sudden arrival spread quickly throughout the shtetl and was discussed in every home. My arrival had instilled fear and anxiety in everyone's heart, but the Jews didn't have to wait long for confirmation. The very next day, Friday, September l, at dawn, the German air force bombed the hinterland of Ostrowiec, in the part called "The Security Triangle." This was supposed to be the security zone. In government circles it had been preplanned that, should the enemy attack border positions and start attacking the capital, Warsaw, the government should then be transferred to this "Triangle" which was situated between Congressional Poland and Galicia. The German air force, however, was swift, overtaking the skies, and already in the initial hours of the war, bombed the district. This caused great panic in the shtetl, as it did throughout the land. This was totally unexpected. There were already victims. The ambulances sped back and forth and there was chaos. This was a warning to the Polish government. You have no place to run to because we will always precede you. There was no longer any planned strategy. There wasn't even time to organize the regiments because immediately in the first hours of the war everything fell apart like a pack of cards, as though the enemy was blocking the plans, simultaneously attacking the border and hinterland, not allowing for a method of concentrating the forces and establishing counter-offence positions.
We sat by the radio listening to the dramatic reports of the war correspondents. We also heard the German Rundfunk, which triumphantly, to the accompaniment of military marches, announced the speedy advance of the German motorized forces. The airspace was totally overrun by German planes. Nowhere was a Polish plane seen. Soon reports arrived that the German forces were in Krakow, in Kielce, in Radom and that they are already on the march towards Warsaw. On Sunday, alarming reports arrived that the Germans are already approaching Ostrowiec, that they are a mere 10 kilometers from the city. At the same time, gruesome reports were being reported about horrible murders of Jews by German troops. Panic prevailed in the city. People scuttled about like poisoned mice, not knowing where to run, nor where to hide in face of the looming danger. Our neighbours, Jews and Christians, left the city during the night. My mother, pale and frightened, came running with the news, wringing her hands and asking in a quivering voice: "Maybe you also should escape from the city? My heart is fearful. I will remain because I don't have the strength to run and wander. I'm too old for that. But as for you… What do you say?" So it was that we decided that the very next day, at dawn, I would be on my way toward Solc in the direction of the Vistula, because there was speculation that there the Polish Army would post themselves and prevent the advance of German troops.
CHAPTER 3
People on the run
Before dawn my mother saw me on my way out of the house. She accompanied me, with tears in her eyes and a prayer softly spoken, as far as the outskirts of the city. In her moist eyes I saw the whole tragedy. People were running from all streets and intersections, many on wagons, others on bicycles and many on foot. The former prefect of the city also ran with me. He was a neighbour of ours, Kazik Bushko. We ran as though someone was already chasing us. Since it was impossible to hire a wagon at any price, we ran on foot. When the sun arose it also started to follow us with its strong rays and the running became even more difficult. The sweat started to pour down and my shirt started to cling to my skin. I went into a village hut and left my jacket there, as well as some other things which I was no longer able to carry. I asked the peasant woman to keep my things for me until I would return.
It became harder and harder to run because my legs became more and more tired and the sweat kept pouring down. People were already running back from the river, refugees who were reporting that it is hell there. All the people on the run, civilians and military, were a sure target for the German planes which were dropping bombs and shooting with machine-guns. Already hundreds had been killed. Above us also the German planes were flying. They continuously descended to observe the refugees. As soon as they spotted military uniformed men they started to shower them with bullets from their machine-guns. We were already encountering dead bodies on our way, in puddles of blood. They had just been killed. There was no need for them to run any further. We, therefore, avoided the main road so that we would not find ourselves close to the military divisions and did not run in large groups. After the terrible news of the situation by the river, we decided not to run in that direction any longer but to look for a place of refuge nearby. I recalled that in this vicinity there should be a village called Baltev, from whence Jewish villagers used to come to us. This village is some distance from the main road, and has no importance for the German air force, so we started on our way there. It was already dusk when, tired and exhausted, we arrived at that village. The sun had just set in the west, leaving behind a fiery red sky which quickly vanished with nightfall. When we arrived at the Jewish estate we weren't the only ones who had come. There was already a full house of refugees.
We collapsed like dead ones, totally exhausted, and quickly fell asleep on the straw which was spread out on the floor. Here we did not hear the shooting nor feel the panic of the refugees who sought to save their lives. Here we met the odd Polish soldiers who had abandoned their units in order to hide. They were quickly provided with civilian clothes so that they could discard their military uniforms. From the distance we could hear the echo of the rumbling tanks, machine fire and the detonation of bombs. Fortunately there was no railway to the village, to which the access was through Polish roads, so we were cut off from the world. This was our good fortune and our salvation.
We lived here like on an island. We ate, drank, swam and went for walks. From the city terrifying news reached us. We heard that when the Germans entered they killed everyone they encountered. Later on they dragged out the most important individuals and shot them in the middle of the street. This they did to frighten the civilians and warn them against sabotage. Upon hearing this news we stayed put. Furthermore, there was no place to run to because the Germans had already advanced. But, how long could we remain this way in the village? Here we were cut off from the whole outside world. Rosh Hashana was approaching. One longed for one's relatives and friends. Every day we received news from peasants from home relating what was happening in the city and on the roads. Comforting news reached us that the disturbances had ceased; people were no longer being murdered and life was returning to normal.
Tuesday, September 12, I decided to return to the city. Wednesday it was already Rosh Hashana. I changed into peasant clothes and together with other peasants I set out for the market place in Ostrowiec. When I reached the main railway station I met German patrolmen for the first time. They searched our wagon to make sure that we were not hiding weapons. The Germans shouted, cursed, and in German asked if we had hidden anything. The peasants motioned with their hands that they do not understand so I imitated them. That's how I arrived safely in the city.
CHAPTER 4
The first Rosh Hashana under German occupation
The Rosh Hashana of 1939, I shall never forget. The synagogues and smaller gathering placed for communal worship were closed, so we gathered in private homes for the Days of Awe. All our neighbours organized a quorum (minyan) in my mother's house. The curtains were drawn, the doors and gates locked, and just as in the time of the Marranos, we conducted the Yom Kippur prayers. We worshipped quietly but with deep sighs and tears in our eyes. Not only women, but men also wiped their eyes because we felt that our life no longer had any value. We stood in the corner and told of the gruesome events, particulars of the first murders when the most noble individuals of the city were taken out of their homes and shot like dogs for no reason at all. We felt that our life was worthless and that the enemy could do with us whatever they willed. Some tried to encourage us, saying that Poles were also murdered, that in every war there are victims, bringing examples from World War I. There were those who also tried to raise the morale, saying that some Jews were doing business with the Germans; that the devil is not as black as he is being portrayed, but we were merely trying to fool ourselves with false illusions. We already saw and felt that we are in the lion's mouth and that we need great mercy in order not to be devoured.
In the middle of worship, someone came running with an alarm. They are on the march! Germans! We Jews quickly removed our prayer shawls and hid in any hole we could find. Later it turned out that this was a false alarm because they merely passed by. I observed the faces of the worshippers. They were all pale, with fear in their eyes, like those sentenced to death. When anyone let out a loud cry or when the cantor struck too high a note everyone became alarmed and started to call out: "Sha... Sha!" (Quiet, Quiet!). From the street newcomers kept arriving. They told how Jews were being dragged to do slave labour. If they "discovered" a minyan they led all the men, with their prayer shawls, to clean the streets and decorate the military vehicles. My mother stood in the corner with her Korben Minchah (the women's prayer book), and sobbed bitterly. She would raise her eyes to me and begin to cry, trembling with her whole body. She looked at me like at one who had been sentenced and whom she desperately wanted to save from death by means of her sincere tears.
Yom Kippur was even more tragic. I am almost certain that that Yom Kippur all Jews fasted, even children and sick persons. The worshipping was like the final prayer before death (vidui). We felt as though the Angel of Death was hovering over our heads with his sword. Jews beat their chests with their fists when asking for forgiveness for their sins, attempting through such means to redeem themselves from sins that they had not even committed. They distributed charity with an open hand and were very warm and friendly to the poor who went about like very special ones. Although they themselves were also in danger, they were consoled by the fact that the wealthy and prominent were in the same situation and that all lives now had equal value. Everyone was suffering and crying bitterly. Quite often people could no longer hold back their tears and started to thrash about as though in a convulsion, as though the overabundance of tears had overflowed all troughs. The Torah Scrolls were regarded prayerfully, wrapped, as they were, in sheets and prayer shawls. After prayers each one slid into their own home with fear in their hearts, awaiting whatever fate was in store for them.
CHAPTER 5
Getting used to the Tzores (Troubles)
The shtetl started to acclimatize itself to the new regime and fresh decrees.
It became clear that this was not a short-term condition because the German army continued to advance, overcoming all opposition. All of Poland was already occupied. The Poles made no effort to oppose the Germans because at the least sign of opposition the Germans punished not only the guilty ones, but the whole city, dragging the most prominent citizens to a place from whence they never returned. Trade started to take place more in secrecy than in the open in spite of the severe punishment at the hands of the conquerors. Goods started to disappear from stores because the Germans, with the help of Poles, robbed everything. German war equipment and black market articles started to appear. Every day new demands were made and fresh limitations arose. For the first time I was seized for forced labour when a young Pole pointed me out: "Jude!" so I was taken to clean military transport trucks. I started to get tired of not having something better do. Also, I wanted to return to Sosnowiec to see what happened to my business which I had abandoned. It was very difficult for me, though, to part from my aged mother under such circumstances. I couldn't allow myself to leave her alone in such a stormy and dangerous time. The mere thought of my leaving sent a shudder through her. She wasn't as much afraid for herself as she was for me setting out on distant roads fraught with danger, but after two months of going around nervous and distraught, my mother agreed that I should return and see what happened to my property. She stipulated, however, that after I saw, I should immediately return.
The trains weren't operating normally yet because many of the tracks had been bombed. I somehow managed to squeeze into a freight train which traveled for two days and two nights. En route I saw many destroyed cities and villages, destroyed bridges and twisted railway tracks. People were running around confused, like birds that have lost their nests and were looking for a place to start building a nest all over again. November l, 1939, we passed through the station in Yendrzejow. That was "All Saints' Day" when people go to the graves of their fathers and say prayers for the souls of the dead. At the station there were a few new graves of killed Poles who had died fighting the German invaders. Candles were burning beside the graves and women in black kneeled and prayed there. Children clung to their mothers with tears and fear in their eyes.
Everywhere one came upon masses of frightened people, refugees in whose eyes one could see the fear and desperation.
They were running in panic, with packs and satchels. They looked like lost souls who could not find their way back home. When our train appeared at a station, hordes of people approached. The first thing they did was throw in their packs, afterwards themselves, over the heads of others who were yelling, cursing and protesting. It was of no help to them though: on the contrary. They were asked, "What do you think, you're travelling first class or in sleeping coaches? If you're looking for convenience stay at home."
With much difficulty we reached Sosnowiec on November 2. Tired and exhausted, I started to look for my house, friends and acquaintances.
CHAPTER 6
Sosnowiec
I could hardly recognize the city. Many stores were closed, others pillaged and many people had run away from the city. This was one of the most important Polish industrial cities. Immediately after breaking through the border point, the German Sturm Kommandos reached the city in a matter of minutes. At once I was told of the first killings. Many of my best friends were shot on the very first day. Moishe Merin, a short thin male, with mousy eyes, one who was known as an idler, as a professional card-player and always looked for assistance, money which he would not have to return, was nominated by the Germans as the "Jewish Elder." He himself applied for this position. This happened in the first two days when all the Jews in the city were locked up in the cellars of the city hall on Pieratzkega. There was such crowding here that there was a lack of fresh air to breathe. After so much fear, and enduring so much, the thousands of Jews had to suffocate in such airless premises, with a shortage of water. People were ready to open up the canal system so that they would drown, just so that they could wet their tongues with a bit of moisture. At night a chief storm trooper came and demanded that the Rebbe of the city be brought forth, if not he would immediately shoot ten Jews. Since the Rebbe was not amongst those locked up, and in order to save ten Jews from death, the 65-year-old Avraham Shtiglitz volunteered, saying that he was the Rebbe. The Germans grabbed him, tore out half his beard, beat him, kicked him and afterwards threw him back into the cellar, all bloodied, demanding that he, together with all the Jews, should say their last confession. The Jews, in one voice, called out: "Shma Yisroel!" because they believed that their end had come. The German beasts delighted at the fact that they had scared the terrorized Jews to death. Later an order was given that they should sing.
The following day the Jews were led out of the cellars, arranged in rows and given a command: "Run!" Confusion reigned. Jews started to run to the accompaniment of beastly shouts, insults, beatings and shots from the Germans until they were driven into the factory of the Shine Brothers. Afterwards it was announced that whoever is a barber should step forward. A few barbers stepped forward. They were given a command that in ten minutes they should return with their work tools, otherwise they would be shot. Returning more dead than alive, with sweat pouring from them, they were commanded to cut off everyone's hair and beard.
When the German beasts tired of this spectacle they commanded that the leaders of the Jewish community should step forward. Nobody stepped forward. When he saw that nobody was stepping forth, Moishe Merin saw a chance to become a somebody. The Germans looked at the pathetic one, small, thin, just a bundle of bones, so they thought: Is this the leader of the Jewish community of Sosnowiec? But, since nobody else stepped forward, they first of all honoured him with a beating and took him to work. He was no fool. He also had nothing to lose so he went for whatever it would be worth.
The Jews were kept for three days and three nights in the cellar of the factory. Later they started letting people out. First those with a trade. The others were taken to jail on Toverova Street. A large number of Jews were afterwards bought out with bribes and the remainder were shot a few days later.
On the ninth of September the synagogue on De Kerta Street was set on fire. The Jews of the neighbouring houses were not allowed out nor was it permitted to rescue the Torah Scrolls. Everyone who approached the synagogue was shot. The following day the Jews were made to clean up the damage and sweep the street. Germans like order.
CHAPTER 7
Terror and evil decrees start
A wave of acts of terror started, shootings and mass executions. This was done in order to terrorize the people. For the slightest pretense, for as little as a mere suspicion of sabotage or uprising, whole streets of people were led out and shot like dogs. There was no rest. One decree followed another, one command followed another, so that the people should be in constant fear, should not have time to think, to organize and to look for solutions, because they had to constantly look for means to stay alive. First they decided to separate the Jews from the rest of the population. Jewish businesses and workshops had to have Germans as commissioners in order to be able to confiscate Jewish property and these immediately became the new owners of the businesses. Jewish homes and factories were taken over by German management. Jews were also denied mobility. They were not allowed to travel by train nor autobus and were not allowed to leave the ghetto. Whole quarters were emptied of Jews who were forced into crowded quarters where two or three families were confined to small living quarters in the ghetto. They had to leave everything there. They were only allowed to take hand baggage. Jews had to wear white arm bands with a blue star of David on their right arm. Later this was changed to a yellow patch with the word "Jude." On the way between Sosnowiec, Bedzin, and Dabrowa there was only one train car for Jews in the beginning. This was hitched into a tramway operating on the line. The Germans would constantly attack the train cars, looking for wrong-doings amongst the Jews and for the most trivial reasons they would take them away never to be seen again. On one they found some money, on another food, and on a third, documents. All this was punishable so that Jews avoided being seen in the streets of the ghetto. They were even less inclined to travel in the Jewish train because they wanted to avoid the controls and searches. The Germans, however, also made their way into Jewish dwellings, stealing everything they could lay their hands on and, in addition, taking victims with them. Jews were not allowed to purchase from non-Jews or in non-Jewish stores. They could only receive rations from Jewish communal sources. Every Jew was allowed 200 grams of bread per day, 100 grams of margarine, 100 grams of sugar and 100 grams of marmalade per week. It was not enough to keep anyone alive, so everyone sought to buy something on the side in order to stay alive. It was, therefore, obvious that everyone was always suspect and in danger of falling into the hands of the German bandits. Jews weren't allowed to go to any theatre or cinema. Jewish children were not allowed to attend a government school and the Jewish schools were closed. In the evenings Jews were not permitted to show themselves in the street, so after six o'clock everyone was confined to the indoors. Radios were also confiscated from the Jews. German broadcasts were not allowed to be heard, and neither, of course, were foreign broadcasts. If a radio was found in any house everyone living there was arrested. There was, therefore, nothing else to do but stay indoors or visit neighbours where one attempted to pass the night.
CHAPTER 8
The refined tricks of the Nazis
The Nazi machine worked with total Nazi precision, according to a prescribed plan. They operated with refined trickery to confuse the people and disorient them so that it could never be discerned what they were aiming at and so as not to stir up any general rage or feeling of desperation which could lead to a revolt. They sought to fool the Jews, to awaken in them the illusion that they can still save themselves. They always issued decrees for one part of the population, creating, in this way, privileged classes in which they hoped to plant hope that it was not them who were meant; that if one segment would be sacrificed, the remaining ones would have a better chance of staying alive as a useful element, and in order for them to be saved, the Nazis required cooperation in helping them carry out their plans concerning the fated ones. Many Jews did, indeed, let themselves get drawn into the net. For this purpose the Nazis established the Judenrat and the Jewish militia who would be instruments in their hands, who would help them carry out their bestial plans for the liquidation. First they demanded that contingents of young people be turned over to them for their slave labour camps. Their intention was to teach a lesson to the young element who would eventually be able to rebel against their plans. The reasoning was that if the young people would be sent to labour in the German factories, the older ones, in return, would remain in the city and live through the war. Afterwards they commanded that the older folks should give themselves up, as well as the children and the sick. This was an unnecessary and unproductive element for them, which they could not permit themselves to sustain in such a difficult war. It was too much of a burden for them. Later they liquidated everyone else. For all this they had the help of the Judenrat and the Jewish militia. The argument of the Elder of the Jews, Moishe Merin, was that if the Judenrat wouldn't do this, the Nazis themselves would do this in a much faster and radical way. When the Germans come to us with their demands, Merin asserted, we still have some control, drag out the decree, bargain a bit and rescue a few. In the meantime we leave the best, most useful element for as long as possible, until it may be possible to save a portion of the population from the annihilation process.
This, however, was a false reckoning. It only meant fooling oneself and fooling others. The intention of the Judenrat was, it is true, to postpone, to serve the Germans in order to save themselves and their relatives, allowing them to be the last ones to be liquidated. Perhaps a miracle would happen meanwhile and they would remain alive. But the Nazis were much smarter and more sophisticated than they were. They thought to themselves: Why do we ourselves have to do this dirty work when the Jews themselves can do it? In fact, they can help rather than hinder for the price of false illusions that they will be able to save themselves. Let the Jews destroy themselves. Later they will complete their work and we will snuff them out. They will not escape from us. In the meantime they are supplying us with everything we ask of them--people, gold, silver and furs. They have established an apparatus, a Judenrat and a militia who are helping us carry out our plans for the foolish price of remaining the last ones, so it was worth their while.
CHAPTER 9
The Judenrat
As already stated, the leader of the Judenrat in Zaglebie was Moishe (Manyek) Merin, who quickly found a language with which to speak to the Nazi functionaries and SS, supplying them with everything they ordered. In return they supported him and gave him all kinds of privileges that it was possible to grant a Jew. In addition to the fact that he carried out all their orders and requests, he showered them all with personal gifts and bribe money. This did not prevent the continuation of the brutal procedures and decrees, but they would, at least, be carried out with the knowledge and help of the Judenrat. He had the opportunity to gain certain small privileges for his relatives and friends and give them protection. Merin attributed to his own achievements and personal influence the establishment, in Sosnowiec and Bedzin, handicraft shops where a few thousand Jews were employed. The Jews gladly got an Arbeits Karte from the Sonderbeauftragten as an employee of Arbeits Einsatz. This helped them remain where they were and not be sent to forced labour camps. The German owners of the shops made a fortune thereby. First, they had all kinds of experienced craftsmen for cheap-as-dirt prices. Secondly, they got considerable sums of bribe money and expensive gifts for constructing such large and small shops and taking in unskilled elements who were looking for protection so that they would not be transported. The craftsmen protected themselves and were able to get work cards for 200 Jews. People paid large sums for this privilege. This money was used to bribe the Gestapo officers, the owners of the shops and the inspectors also had thereby a great advantage because they were not sent to the front since they were engaged in essential war work which supplied the Wehrmacht with uniforms, clothing, boots, shoes and other necessities.
This success gave Merin the courage and chutzpah to want to become the head of all the Jewish Judenr”te in the inner half of the German Reich and in the conquered territories. He rode, with permission from the Gestapo, to Berlin, Prague, Warsaw, Lodz, Krakow and other cities where he advised Jewish communities to unite under one organization with a central committee, putting forth his name as the candidate for the position of president of the Central Committee, because of his good connections and experience in dealing with such groups, giving as an example the Judenrat of Zaglambia under his leadership. He preached to the local Jewish leaders, pointing out their flaws, promising to give them true orientation if they will allow him to lead them. It seems that local leaders regarded him with skepticism. Above all, his stature did not induce confidence for he was a small man, with mousy eyes and a distrustful smile. It could immediately be seen that he projected the image of a cheap careerist, a product of Jewish suffering and Jewish destruction. Dr. Feivl Viderman, a Jewish intellectual survivor and community leader from Bedzin, tells in his book Di Blonde Bestia about a meeting that took place in the Judenrat under the chairmanship of Moishe Merin where the latter reported on his visits to a number of Jewish centres and their liquidation. At that time he said, "You have heard that I and Frau Charney (who was his secretary and right hand person) have visited the largest Jewish centres so that we know exactly what is happening there. We have even been to Berlin and Prague and what we saw there can only be described as desperation. There is lacking a strong hand which can be effective in the difficult situation. The leaders of the German and Czech Jews lost their heads. The Jews there do not have any influence regarding the deportations. When I was there I reminded the leaders of their negative stand to my suggestion of a half year ago that we should establish one central body for all the Jewish communities in Germany and the annexed territories but they did not want to hear of it, all because of their dislike of Polish Jews. Today also they are against the establishment of a union of all communal bodies, fearing that the influence will fall into my hands, the hands of a Moishe Merin, a Polish Jew who does not have a good command of the German language, not trusting me to deal in their name with the Germans." Furthermore, he declared triumphantly, "Because of their faults, the German and Czech Jews are suffering so badly today. Today we need energetic, courageous new leaders because the former diplomacy has gone bankrupt and that explains my great success." He continued with a further argument saying, "That's how it is on the Western front, but it's no better in the East. There too, helplessness and desperation prevails. I foresee that in the near future all Jewish communities will be wiped out, and no sign of them will remain. That, meine Herren, is the result of false politics which the heads of the communities are practising: Rumkofsky in Lodz and Czerniakow in Warsaw with whom I can't come to terms. At a meeting with them, during my talk which lasted three hours, I could not convince them of the falsity of their approach and in the correctness of my politics. They did not want, or simply were not capable of understanding me. Because of this the sad consequences won't be long in coming."
This gives a clear picture of the general situation and the role of Moishe Merin which he took upon himself to play during the destruction of European Jewry. He tried to play the role of a "King of the Jews", as the Germans ironically called him. He wanted to go down in Jewish history as the chief liquidator of European Jewry. Moishe Merin behaved like a dictator. He did have a Judenrat which consisted of a few figures, but he didn't consider their opinions very much. He himself made all the decisions and they were merely his upholders, his servants who had to carry out all his decisions.
In the hands of Moishe Merin rested the fate of approximately 100,000 Jews of Zaglebie. He sent to death whomever he wanted to and whomever he wanted to, he temporarily let live. He was granted this privilege by his German patrons, for the price of serving them to liquidate the Jewish communities in Zaglebie. Everyone feared him and sought to please him and to play up to him. At one of the mass meetings which took place in the "Rialto" where he appealed to the population to come forward for the selection which was scheduled to take place at the city's sports stadium, one of the rabbis who was present called out, either because of wanting to find grace or because of stupidity, that we are fortunate that the Almighty sent us such a leader because "Since Moshe until Moshe there has not been one like Moishe."
Moishe Merin chose co-workers from various classes who were prepared to do whatever he commanded and with them he established the Judenrat. Mainly he sought people of a certain communal reputation and who were intellectuals, for the price of not being liquidated. He also had a number of spetzn (informers) who knew the city very well. They knew who had money, valuables and hidden goods. There were others who had connections with communal circles to bring him information about what was taking place in the city and in the underground movements. There was a young man from Bedzin who had a good position with him, a very handsome fellow who was very popular with women. This one was his "Officer of the Women". He brought for the "King of the Jews," the most beautiful women because what woman didn't need a small favour? One needed a place to live. Another needed a place to work. A third needed food items. A fourth wanted her dearest ones to be spared from deportation, so they were at the mercy of the "King of the Jews" and that got them favour with him. In cases where the woman happened to have a husband who stood in the way, he was quickly dispatched with the next group to forced labour.
CHAPTER 10
The problem of shelter in the ghetto
The problem of living quarters was very acute. After the ghetto had been established and its area more and more reduced, Jews were thrown out of their living quarters and were packed into small places where two, three and more families lived in the quarters where formerly only one family lived in the ghetto. Sanitary conditions were abhorrent. The aristocratic families were most affected because they were used to the greatest comfort. The one in charge of living quarters was, actually, a traditional Jew, Hersh Dovid Caiser. When he would be out on the street tens of people would run after him, pleading for a roof over their head or to move them elsewhere because they could not tolerate their neighbours. He was the one who could satisfy them through the grace of Merin or his closest co-workers. As a result, anyone who didn't have money or other means of bribing was in dire straits. When I had to give up my place on Mashtitzkiego right opposite the Agrudek, the city park, where the air was nice and fresh, I had a bitter taste in my mouth. It's true, I didn't have very much because I was a bachelor so I was a renter by the Grytzers. After much intervention I managed to get a bed in quarters with another bachelor, a young fellow, Schlesinger, whose family was liquidated a few weeks previously. The whole apartment of four rooms and a salon belonged to the Schlesinger family but after the family had been sent away the son was allowed only one room and the remainder was given to prominent people because it was centrally located on Targova Street not far from the Judenrat. In one room lived the chief of the Jewish police, Kleiner. In another room a red-haired tall girl, an appointee of the Judenrat, together with her family, and in the remaining room I lived with the bachelor. We all shared a corridor.
I pitied the young fellow. He was very young, seventeen perhaps, and left completely alone in the world. He suffered terribly. The sadness was spelled out in his face. He felt abandoned and endangered. He feared that he would also be sent off. He worked night shift in a shop and slept during the day. With each day he became thinner and paler. I tried to befriend him and boost his morale but he no longer trusted anyone. Once he came to me and asked for advice. Acquaintances, friends of his family, with pull, had arranged a position for him as a Jewish militia man. He asked me if he should accept the position. He placed me in a very difficult situation because I didn't know what to answer him. I, personally, felt that a Jew should not accept any position with the Germans and their Jewish servants. But, at the same time I could not take it upon myself to tell him to refuse because such advice might cause him to be sent away to his death. I, therefore, answered him that it is a personal matter, a matter of conscience which each one has to decide for himself.
The young fellow would not give up. He shoved me to the wall and asked me, "And if you had the opportunity would you accept such an offer?" This put me on the spot because I had already had such an opportunity and I categorically refused. I worked in my own shop where plate glass was made. There I was a stock keeper. The offices of the shop were on the same Targova Street at number 11. As a large shop which dealt with wagons of glass, dispatching wagons all the way to Russia, "a trusted one " I managed this shop. First it was a German from the neighbouring shtetl Swietochlowice, by the name of Poshled. Before the war, he was our customer who was a friend of mine. Later, when he became the commissioner of my shop he treated me with a certain politeness and respect. It was he who made the effort to make me the stock keeper and he provided me with a work card. Later he was replaced by another German of the area who came from Riga, a certain Palatzer. This one looked at me askew and wanted to get rid of me. When he discovered that I was the former owner of the shop he started to get scared, fearing that the war might possibly end quickly, with a defeat for the Germans, and that I would take the shop back from him. He had already invested capital in it. At first he didn't dare to do me wrong because I had once been the proprietor and now I was a poorly paid hired worker of minor importance, but afterward he decided that it was not a good idea for me to work there. I, naturally tried to please him, to be quick and conscientious. I also did the work of three hired ones because I had experience in this field. His glances started to cut me as with knives. I confided to my relatives and friends regarding my situation and sought their advice. I had a cousin in Sosnowiec whose mother, a sister of my mother, lived with her husband in Olkush, a shtetl approximately 80 kilometres from Sosnowiec. Their eldest son had married a girl whose sister was the wife of the Jewish police commissar. One day my uncle came to me with a suggestion that I should accept the position of Jewish militia man. He would use his influence, speak to his relative, the police commandant, to take me into the police work. I, upon hearing this suggestion, froze. I, a militia man! I would have to seize Jewish victims and supply them for the transports. I would be assisting the Germans and their Jewish servants. No way would I do that! My uncle, my aunt and their friends argued with me for hours, putting forth all kinds of suggestions. First of all, they said, I would be protected so that I wouldn't be sent away with the transports. The militiamen would be the last ones to be deported. Secondly, I would have food to eat and I would not starve from hunger. "Your present commissar will see to it," they continued, "that you be sent to be liquidated because you do not let him rest in peace, so why wait until it will be too late? Assure yourself of a safe position." Saying this, my aunt began to cry. Her own blood, a child of her eldest sister, how could she allow me to be deported with the transport to Auschwitz? I stood firm and said that I don't want to face such a trial, to have to force Jews to the transports and watch that they should not run away, only to save myself. I did not want to become a cruel Jew. But they tried to make me change my mind, arguing that a militia man does not have to be mean or cruel. It is possible to be a good militia man, they argued, one who helps people, helps them in their need and saves people. They worked on me for a whole week, but I did not allow myself to change my mind, so when the Schlesinger fellow asked me how I would behave in such a circumstance I concealed from him my experience and circumvented giving him a clear answer. The end was that he did accept the position and one day he appeared in a blue and white police hat with a stiff brim. The hat did not suit his face. His face was refined, pale, with a subtle smile which is in direct contrast to a law enforcer and chapper (grabber). To this day I do not know what happened to him because I was sometime later sent away with a transport and he remained in Sosnowiec.
CHAPTER I
Not God, not man, but the devil
Many people still didn't believe that war was so imminent. Many still comforted themselves with the thought that in the very last moment a catastrophe would be avoided; that it is merely a political struggle which would somehow be settled before the world would become immersed in war. Nevertheless, the tension could be felt in the air. The danger was almost palpable. Hitler was making fiery hate speeches, threatening total war if he would not be granted his desires. The Polish Chief of the Army, Rydz-Smigly, fiercely proclaimed that "even a button from my uniform I will not relinquish," that he is ready for the struggle to defend his homeland. The raving of hundreds of thousands of aroused followers of the F¸hrer could be loudly heard shouting ceaselessly: Sieg Heil!
During the last days of August, 1939, it was already felt that war is unavoidable. Every day the newspapers announced alarming news with large headlines across the front page that a storm is approaching. Hitler's voice could be heard thundering on radio, threatening to annihilate anyone who would oppose him as he marched on his way to reach his aim. All diplomatic intervention, such as that of Chamberlain of England and Daladier of France, did not help. It appeared that the lion had freed himself from the chain and could no longer be held in check.
The Polish army mobilized all its troops, calling up all its reservists to organize the opposition. Young people with knapsacks could be seen everywhere, gathering at assembly points. At night blackouts were rehearsed. The city was enveloped in darkness. Commandos of the Air Force came around, checking if everyone was following the blackout instructions. Reflectors lit up the sky, searching for enemy planes over Polish territory. The youth were amused by this spectacle. The August nights were mild. In the air was the scent of ripe fruit and abundant fields. Boys and girls went about in the streets laughing, without worry and amused themselves in the darkness and alarm drills. They cast their eyes upwards to listen to the roar of the steel birds which patrolled the sky. It all appeared like a joke. It was called alarm preparedness for any eventuality, though it would not be needed.
***
Jews, who are generally very aware of danger, immediately felt the danger of the moment. Trouble could be sensed. Wealthy Jews immediately acquired passports. Others sent money out of the country so that they would have means to survive, should they have to wander. The poor tried to console themselves that these were only idle threats to scare the masses; that at the last moment a miracle would occur. There were also "strategists" who calculated that Hitler was incapable of waging war because he is unprepared; that the whole world would oppose him; that his tanks and cannons are made of plastic; that it was all swindle and bluff. In the cafÈs, discussions took place amidst joking and laughter throughout the crowd.
I escape from the border
During the last years before World War II, I lived and worked in Sosnowiec, an industrial city in Poland, a mere seven kilometers from Katowice, the capital of Oberschlesien. We were very close to the German border where Hitler had mobilized his troops, so it was expected that the first battle would take place here. Whoever had the possibility ran away to the hinterland in order to be as far away as possible from the line of fire. Even those who did not believe that there would be a war also wanted to be as far as possible from the border until the threat would pass. I myself also entertained this idea for two reasons: First of all, I wanted to be as far away as possible from the German border because even if the chance of only minor incidents occurring existed, it was wiser to be farther away. Secondly, at such a critical time I wanted to be near my mother who was living by herself in Ostrowiec. True, she was living with her family--her mother, a brother and nieces and other relatives, but none of her children were with her, so I, who was at that time unmarried, should be at my mother's side at such a critical time. As soon as I made my decision, I went to the station, purchased a ticket, and Wednesday, August 30, 1939, departed by train from Sosnowiec to Kielce and from there with another train to Ostrowiec. As I later discovered, that was the last civilian train to leave Sosnowiec. Already, at the train station, I felt the high tension in the air. Nervous military men were around, reservists, recruits and nurses who were hurrying to their garrisons. The speedy train passed by various stations very quickly, not pausing, as though there was no time. Everywhere one beheld the same scenes. Confused people were running back and forth, shoving one another, hurrying. Everyone had fear in their eyes. In Skarzysko, where I had to transfer, I could only manage with great difficulty to get into a regular coach train because it was full of army personnel. I squeezed in amongst the sweaty bodies. One could smell the strong odours of sweat and whisky. Many drunken voices could be heard all around singing some sort of military songs but without any rhythm. These were a variety of compositions, some of which were melancholic, full of longing. All this blended with the noise of the wheels and the steaming of the engine which wended its way through the thick Polish forests and endless plains. The train continued on its way urgently through the sunken-in-sleep villages, leaving an echo of military marches and the unsettling whistle of the locomotive which the wind carried through the neighbouring fields and forests.
Late at night I arrived at the Ostrowiec station. I could barely manage to squeeze my way out with my valise. In the darkness of night the coachman, Yosel Kabaleh, recognized me. He grabbed the valise from me, pushed me into a packed wagon and brought me to the sleeping city. My mother, frightened and trembling, hearing my voice, opened the door and rejoiced at the sight of me, as though God Himself had sent an angel to her. She would at least have one child beside her so that she would not feel so lonely during such dreadful days. I felt that I had instilled a new spirit in my mother. I recalled that long ago, when I was a young child, I would cuddle up in this way, with my mother, seeking her protection when there would be thunder and lightening outside.
CHAPTER 2
My first contact with the shtetl
When, on the following day, Thursday, people saw me in the village, they looked at me wonderingly. I used to come sometimes to the shtetl for Passover and sometimes for the High Holidays, but they could not understand what I was doing there on an ordinary Thursday. What had happened? They started to interrogate me, to question me: "Is it true that there is already fear at the border?" Since I just came from the border, they assumed that I must know. When I went out in the street I could see, in the distance, how my mother was explaining my sudden appearance to the neighbours.
My first visit was to the Jewish cemetery to the grave of my father, of blessed memory. This was beside the home of the Ostrowiec rebbe, Reb Maier Yechiel Halevi, of blessed memory. While I was praying at the grave site, a cool wind blew and the branches of the trees swayed religiously as though they were saying prayers together with me. I exited the cemetery comforted, feeling as though I had fulfilled a holy obligation upon which my destiny depended.
Outside, Jews came to greet me, to say Shalom Aleichem, as though wanting to prove that I am truly present. The news of my sudden arrival spread quickly throughout the shtetl and was discussed in every home. My arrival had instilled fear and anxiety in everyone's heart, but the Jews didn't have to wait long for confirmation. The very next day, Friday, September l, at dawn, the German air force bombed the hinterland of Ostrowiec, in the part called "The Security Triangle." This was supposed to be the security zone. In government circles it had been preplanned that, should the enemy attack border positions and start attacking the capital, Warsaw, the government should then be transferred to this "Triangle" which was situated between Congressional Poland and Galicia. The German air force, however, was swift, overtaking the skies, and already in the initial hours of the war, bombed the district. This caused great panic in the shtetl, as it did throughout the land. This was totally unexpected. There were already victims. The ambulances sped back and forth and there was chaos. This was a warning to the Polish government. You have no place to run to because we will always precede you. There was no longer any planned strategy. There wasn't even time to organize the regiments because immediately in the first hours of the war everything fell apart like a pack of cards, as though the enemy was blocking the plans, simultaneously attacking the border and hinterland, not allowing for a method of concentrating the forces and establishing counter-offence positions.
We sat by the radio listening to the dramatic reports of the war correspondents. We also heard the German Rundfunk, which triumphantly, to the accompaniment of military marches, announced the speedy advance of the German motorized forces. The airspace was totally overrun by German planes. Nowhere was a Polish plane seen. Soon reports arrived that the German forces were in Krakow, in Kielce, in Radom and that they are already on the march towards Warsaw. On Sunday, alarming reports arrived that the Germans are already approaching Ostrowiec, that they are a mere 10 kilometers from the city. At the same time, gruesome reports were being reported about horrible murders of Jews by German troops. Panic prevailed in the city. People scuttled about like poisoned mice, not knowing where to run, nor where to hide in face of the looming danger. Our neighbours, Jews and Christians, left the city during the night. My mother, pale and frightened, came running with the news, wringing her hands and asking in a quivering voice: "Maybe you also should escape from the city? My heart is fearful. I will remain because I don't have the strength to run and wander. I'm too old for that. But as for you… What do you say?" So it was that we decided that the very next day, at dawn, I would be on my way toward Solc in the direction of the Vistula, because there was speculation that there the Polish Army would post themselves and prevent the advance of German troops.
CHAPTER 3
People on the run
Before dawn my mother saw me on my way out of the house. She accompanied me, with tears in her eyes and a prayer softly spoken, as far as the outskirts of the city. In her moist eyes I saw the whole tragedy. People were running from all streets and intersections, many on wagons, others on bicycles and many on foot. The former prefect of the city also ran with me. He was a neighbour of ours, Kazik Bushko. We ran as though someone was already chasing us. Since it was impossible to hire a wagon at any price, we ran on foot. When the sun arose it also started to follow us with its strong rays and the running became even more difficult. The sweat started to pour down and my shirt started to cling to my skin. I went into a village hut and left my jacket there, as well as some other things which I was no longer able to carry. I asked the peasant woman to keep my things for me until I would return.
It became harder and harder to run because my legs became more and more tired and the sweat kept pouring down. People were already running back from the river, refugees who were reporting that it is hell there. All the people on the run, civilians and military, were a sure target for the German planes which were dropping bombs and shooting with machine-guns. Already hundreds had been killed. Above us also the German planes were flying. They continuously descended to observe the refugees. As soon as they spotted military uniformed men they started to shower them with bullets from their machine-guns. We were already encountering dead bodies on our way, in puddles of blood. They had just been killed. There was no need for them to run any further. We, therefore, avoided the main road so that we would not find ourselves close to the military divisions and did not run in large groups. After the terrible news of the situation by the river, we decided not to run in that direction any longer but to look for a place of refuge nearby. I recalled that in this vicinity there should be a village called Baltev, from whence Jewish villagers used to come to us. This village is some distance from the main road, and has no importance for the German air force, so we started on our way there. It was already dusk when, tired and exhausted, we arrived at that village. The sun had just set in the west, leaving behind a fiery red sky which quickly vanished with nightfall. When we arrived at the Jewish estate we weren't the only ones who had come. There was already a full house of refugees.
We collapsed like dead ones, totally exhausted, and quickly fell asleep on the straw which was spread out on the floor. Here we did not hear the shooting nor feel the panic of the refugees who sought to save their lives. Here we met the odd Polish soldiers who had abandoned their units in order to hide. They were quickly provided with civilian clothes so that they could discard their military uniforms. From the distance we could hear the echo of the rumbling tanks, machine fire and the detonation of bombs. Fortunately there was no railway to the village, to which the access was through Polish roads, so we were cut off from the world. This was our good fortune and our salvation.
We lived here like on an island. We ate, drank, swam and went for walks. From the city terrifying news reached us. We heard that when the Germans entered they killed everyone they encountered. Later on they dragged out the most important individuals and shot them in the middle of the street. This they did to frighten the civilians and warn them against sabotage. Upon hearing this news we stayed put. Furthermore, there was no place to run to because the Germans had already advanced. But, how long could we remain this way in the village? Here we were cut off from the whole outside world. Rosh Hashana was approaching. One longed for one's relatives and friends. Every day we received news from peasants from home relating what was happening in the city and on the roads. Comforting news reached us that the disturbances had ceased; people were no longer being murdered and life was returning to normal.
Tuesday, September 12, I decided to return to the city. Wednesday it was already Rosh Hashana. I changed into peasant clothes and together with other peasants I set out for the market place in Ostrowiec. When I reached the main railway station I met German patrolmen for the first time. They searched our wagon to make sure that we were not hiding weapons. The Germans shouted, cursed, and in German asked if we had hidden anything. The peasants motioned with their hands that they do not understand so I imitated them. That's how I arrived safely in the city.
CHAPTER 4
The first Rosh Hashana under German occupation
The Rosh Hashana of 1939, I shall never forget. The synagogues and smaller gathering placed for communal worship were closed, so we gathered in private homes for the Days of Awe. All our neighbours organized a quorum (minyan) in my mother's house. The curtains were drawn, the doors and gates locked, and just as in the time of the Marranos, we conducted the Yom Kippur prayers. We worshipped quietly but with deep sighs and tears in our eyes. Not only women, but men also wiped their eyes because we felt that our life no longer had any value. We stood in the corner and told of the gruesome events, particulars of the first murders when the most noble individuals of the city were taken out of their homes and shot like dogs for no reason at all. We felt that our life was worthless and that the enemy could do with us whatever they willed. Some tried to encourage us, saying that Poles were also murdered, that in every war there are victims, bringing examples from World War I. There were those who also tried to raise the morale, saying that some Jews were doing business with the Germans; that the devil is not as black as he is being portrayed, but we were merely trying to fool ourselves with false illusions. We already saw and felt that we are in the lion's mouth and that we need great mercy in order not to be devoured.
In the middle of worship, someone came running with an alarm. They are on the march! Germans! We Jews quickly removed our prayer shawls and hid in any hole we could find. Later it turned out that this was a false alarm because they merely passed by. I observed the faces of the worshippers. They were all pale, with fear in their eyes, like those sentenced to death. When anyone let out a loud cry or when the cantor struck too high a note everyone became alarmed and started to call out: "Sha... Sha!" (Quiet, Quiet!). From the street newcomers kept arriving. They told how Jews were being dragged to do slave labour. If they "discovered" a minyan they led all the men, with their prayer shawls, to clean the streets and decorate the military vehicles. My mother stood in the corner with her Korben Minchah (the women's prayer book), and sobbed bitterly. She would raise her eyes to me and begin to cry, trembling with her whole body. She looked at me like at one who had been sentenced and whom she desperately wanted to save from death by means of her sincere tears.
Yom Kippur was even more tragic. I am almost certain that that Yom Kippur all Jews fasted, even children and sick persons. The worshipping was like the final prayer before death (vidui). We felt as though the Angel of Death was hovering over our heads with his sword. Jews beat their chests with their fists when asking for forgiveness for their sins, attempting through such means to redeem themselves from sins that they had not even committed. They distributed charity with an open hand and were very warm and friendly to the poor who went about like very special ones. Although they themselves were also in danger, they were consoled by the fact that the wealthy and prominent were in the same situation and that all lives now had equal value. Everyone was suffering and crying bitterly. Quite often people could no longer hold back their tears and started to thrash about as though in a convulsion, as though the overabundance of tears had overflowed all troughs. The Torah Scrolls were regarded prayerfully, wrapped, as they were, in sheets and prayer shawls. After prayers each one slid into their own home with fear in their hearts, awaiting whatever fate was in store for them.
CHAPTER 5
Getting used to the Tzores (Troubles)
The shtetl started to acclimatize itself to the new regime and fresh decrees.
It became clear that this was not a short-term condition because the German army continued to advance, overcoming all opposition. All of Poland was already occupied. The Poles made no effort to oppose the Germans because at the least sign of opposition the Germans punished not only the guilty ones, but the whole city, dragging the most prominent citizens to a place from whence they never returned. Trade started to take place more in secrecy than in the open in spite of the severe punishment at the hands of the conquerors. Goods started to disappear from stores because the Germans, with the help of Poles, robbed everything. German war equipment and black market articles started to appear. Every day new demands were made and fresh limitations arose. For the first time I was seized for forced labour when a young Pole pointed me out: "Jude!" so I was taken to clean military transport trucks. I started to get tired of not having something better do. Also, I wanted to return to Sosnowiec to see what happened to my business which I had abandoned. It was very difficult for me, though, to part from my aged mother under such circumstances. I couldn't allow myself to leave her alone in such a stormy and dangerous time. The mere thought of my leaving sent a shudder through her. She wasn't as much afraid for herself as she was for me setting out on distant roads fraught with danger, but after two months of going around nervous and distraught, my mother agreed that I should return and see what happened to my property. She stipulated, however, that after I saw, I should immediately return.
The trains weren't operating normally yet because many of the tracks had been bombed. I somehow managed to squeeze into a freight train which traveled for two days and two nights. En route I saw many destroyed cities and villages, destroyed bridges and twisted railway tracks. People were running around confused, like birds that have lost their nests and were looking for a place to start building a nest all over again. November l, 1939, we passed through the station in Yendrzejow. That was "All Saints' Day" when people go to the graves of their fathers and say prayers for the souls of the dead. At the station there were a few new graves of killed Poles who had died fighting the German invaders. Candles were burning beside the graves and women in black kneeled and prayed there. Children clung to their mothers with tears and fear in their eyes.
Everywhere one came upon masses of frightened people, refugees in whose eyes one could see the fear and desperation.
They were running in panic, with packs and satchels. They looked like lost souls who could not find their way back home. When our train appeared at a station, hordes of people approached. The first thing they did was throw in their packs, afterwards themselves, over the heads of others who were yelling, cursing and protesting. It was of no help to them though: on the contrary. They were asked, "What do you think, you're travelling first class or in sleeping coaches? If you're looking for convenience stay at home."
With much difficulty we reached Sosnowiec on November 2. Tired and exhausted, I started to look for my house, friends and acquaintances.
CHAPTER 6
Sosnowiec
I could hardly recognize the city. Many stores were closed, others pillaged and many people had run away from the city. This was one of the most important Polish industrial cities. Immediately after breaking through the border point, the German Sturm Kommandos reached the city in a matter of minutes. At once I was told of the first killings. Many of my best friends were shot on the very first day. Moishe Merin, a short thin male, with mousy eyes, one who was known as an idler, as a professional card-player and always looked for assistance, money which he would not have to return, was nominated by the Germans as the "Jewish Elder." He himself applied for this position. This happened in the first two days when all the Jews in the city were locked up in the cellars of the city hall on Pieratzkega. There was such crowding here that there was a lack of fresh air to breathe. After so much fear, and enduring so much, the thousands of Jews had to suffocate in such airless premises, with a shortage of water. People were ready to open up the canal system so that they would drown, just so that they could wet their tongues with a bit of moisture. At night a chief storm trooper came and demanded that the Rebbe of the city be brought forth, if not he would immediately shoot ten Jews. Since the Rebbe was not amongst those locked up, and in order to save ten Jews from death, the 65-year-old Avraham Shtiglitz volunteered, saying that he was the Rebbe. The Germans grabbed him, tore out half his beard, beat him, kicked him and afterwards threw him back into the cellar, all bloodied, demanding that he, together with all the Jews, should say their last confession. The Jews, in one voice, called out: "Shma Yisroel!" because they believed that their end had come. The German beasts delighted at the fact that they had scared the terrorized Jews to death. Later an order was given that they should sing.
The following day the Jews were led out of the cellars, arranged in rows and given a command: "Run!" Confusion reigned. Jews started to run to the accompaniment of beastly shouts, insults, beatings and shots from the Germans until they were driven into the factory of the Shine Brothers. Afterwards it was announced that whoever is a barber should step forward. A few barbers stepped forward. They were given a command that in ten minutes they should return with their work tools, otherwise they would be shot. Returning more dead than alive, with sweat pouring from them, they were commanded to cut off everyone's hair and beard.
When the German beasts tired of this spectacle they commanded that the leaders of the Jewish community should step forward. Nobody stepped forward. When he saw that nobody was stepping forth, Moishe Merin saw a chance to become a somebody. The Germans looked at the pathetic one, small, thin, just a bundle of bones, so they thought: Is this the leader of the Jewish community of Sosnowiec? But, since nobody else stepped forward, they first of all honoured him with a beating and took him to work. He was no fool. He also had nothing to lose so he went for whatever it would be worth.
The Jews were kept for three days and three nights in the cellar of the factory. Later they started letting people out. First those with a trade. The others were taken to jail on Toverova Street. A large number of Jews were afterwards bought out with bribes and the remainder were shot a few days later.
On the ninth of September the synagogue on De Kerta Street was set on fire. The Jews of the neighbouring houses were not allowed out nor was it permitted to rescue the Torah Scrolls. Everyone who approached the synagogue was shot. The following day the Jews were made to clean up the damage and sweep the street. Germans like order.
CHAPTER 7
Terror and evil decrees start
A wave of acts of terror started, shootings and mass executions. This was done in order to terrorize the people. For the slightest pretense, for as little as a mere suspicion of sabotage or uprising, whole streets of people were led out and shot like dogs. There was no rest. One decree followed another, one command followed another, so that the people should be in constant fear, should not have time to think, to organize and to look for solutions, because they had to constantly look for means to stay alive. First they decided to separate the Jews from the rest of the population. Jewish businesses and workshops had to have Germans as commissioners in order to be able to confiscate Jewish property and these immediately became the new owners of the businesses. Jewish homes and factories were taken over by German management. Jews were also denied mobility. They were not allowed to travel by train nor autobus and were not allowed to leave the ghetto. Whole quarters were emptied of Jews who were forced into crowded quarters where two or three families were confined to small living quarters in the ghetto. They had to leave everything there. They were only allowed to take hand baggage. Jews had to wear white arm bands with a blue star of David on their right arm. Later this was changed to a yellow patch with the word "Jude." On the way between Sosnowiec, Bedzin, and Dabrowa there was only one train car for Jews in the beginning. This was hitched into a tramway operating on the line. The Germans would constantly attack the train cars, looking for wrong-doings amongst the Jews and for the most trivial reasons they would take them away never to be seen again. On one they found some money, on another food, and on a third, documents. All this was punishable so that Jews avoided being seen in the streets of the ghetto. They were even less inclined to travel in the Jewish train because they wanted to avoid the controls and searches. The Germans, however, also made their way into Jewish dwellings, stealing everything they could lay their hands on and, in addition, taking victims with them. Jews were not allowed to purchase from non-Jews or in non-Jewish stores. They could only receive rations from Jewish communal sources. Every Jew was allowed 200 grams of bread per day, 100 grams of margarine, 100 grams of sugar and 100 grams of marmalade per week. It was not enough to keep anyone alive, so everyone sought to buy something on the side in order to stay alive. It was, therefore, obvious that everyone was always suspect and in danger of falling into the hands of the German bandits. Jews weren't allowed to go to any theatre or cinema. Jewish children were not allowed to attend a government school and the Jewish schools were closed. In the evenings Jews were not permitted to show themselves in the street, so after six o'clock everyone was confined to the indoors. Radios were also confiscated from the Jews. German broadcasts were not allowed to be heard, and neither, of course, were foreign broadcasts. If a radio was found in any house everyone living there was arrested. There was, therefore, nothing else to do but stay indoors or visit neighbours where one attempted to pass the night.
CHAPTER 8
The refined tricks of the Nazis
The Nazi machine worked with total Nazi precision, according to a prescribed plan. They operated with refined trickery to confuse the people and disorient them so that it could never be discerned what they were aiming at and so as not to stir up any general rage or feeling of desperation which could lead to a revolt. They sought to fool the Jews, to awaken in them the illusion that they can still save themselves. They always issued decrees for one part of the population, creating, in this way, privileged classes in which they hoped to plant hope that it was not them who were meant; that if one segment would be sacrificed, the remaining ones would have a better chance of staying alive as a useful element, and in order for them to be saved, the Nazis required cooperation in helping them carry out their plans concerning the fated ones. Many Jews did, indeed, let themselves get drawn into the net. For this purpose the Nazis established the Judenrat and the Jewish militia who would be instruments in their hands, who would help them carry out their bestial plans for the liquidation. First they demanded that contingents of young people be turned over to them for their slave labour camps. Their intention was to teach a lesson to the young element who would eventually be able to rebel against their plans. The reasoning was that if the young people would be sent to labour in the German factories, the older ones, in return, would remain in the city and live through the war. Afterwards they commanded that the older folks should give themselves up, as well as the children and the sick. This was an unnecessary and unproductive element for them, which they could not permit themselves to sustain in such a difficult war. It was too much of a burden for them. Later they liquidated everyone else. For all this they had the help of the Judenrat and the Jewish militia. The argument of the Elder of the Jews, Moishe Merin, was that if the Judenrat wouldn't do this, the Nazis themselves would do this in a much faster and radical way. When the Germans come to us with their demands, Merin asserted, we still have some control, drag out the decree, bargain a bit and rescue a few. In the meantime we leave the best, most useful element for as long as possible, until it may be possible to save a portion of the population from the annihilation process.
This, however, was a false reckoning. It only meant fooling oneself and fooling others. The intention of the Judenrat was, it is true, to postpone, to serve the Germans in order to save themselves and their relatives, allowing them to be the last ones to be liquidated. Perhaps a miracle would happen meanwhile and they would remain alive. But the Nazis were much smarter and more sophisticated than they were. They thought to themselves: Why do we ourselves have to do this dirty work when the Jews themselves can do it? In fact, they can help rather than hinder for the price of false illusions that they will be able to save themselves. Let the Jews destroy themselves. Later they will complete their work and we will snuff them out. They will not escape from us. In the meantime they are supplying us with everything we ask of them--people, gold, silver and furs. They have established an apparatus, a Judenrat and a militia who are helping us carry out our plans for the foolish price of remaining the last ones, so it was worth their while.
CHAPTER 9
The Judenrat
As already stated, the leader of the Judenrat in Zaglebie was Moishe (Manyek) Merin, who quickly found a language with which to speak to the Nazi functionaries and SS, supplying them with everything they ordered. In return they supported him and gave him all kinds of privileges that it was possible to grant a Jew. In addition to the fact that he carried out all their orders and requests, he showered them all with personal gifts and bribe money. This did not prevent the continuation of the brutal procedures and decrees, but they would, at least, be carried out with the knowledge and help of the Judenrat. He had the opportunity to gain certain small privileges for his relatives and friends and give them protection. Merin attributed to his own achievements and personal influence the establishment, in Sosnowiec and Bedzin, handicraft shops where a few thousand Jews were employed. The Jews gladly got an Arbeits Karte from the Sonderbeauftragten as an employee of Arbeits Einsatz. This helped them remain where they were and not be sent to forced labour camps. The German owners of the shops made a fortune thereby. First, they had all kinds of experienced craftsmen for cheap-as-dirt prices. Secondly, they got considerable sums of bribe money and expensive gifts for constructing such large and small shops and taking in unskilled elements who were looking for protection so that they would not be transported. The craftsmen protected themselves and were able to get work cards for 200 Jews. People paid large sums for this privilege. This money was used to bribe the Gestapo officers, the owners of the shops and the inspectors also had thereby a great advantage because they were not sent to the front since they were engaged in essential war work which supplied the Wehrmacht with uniforms, clothing, boots, shoes and other necessities.
This success gave Merin the courage and chutzpah to want to become the head of all the Jewish Judenr”te in the inner half of the German Reich and in the conquered territories. He rode, with permission from the Gestapo, to Berlin, Prague, Warsaw, Lodz, Krakow and other cities where he advised Jewish communities to unite under one organization with a central committee, putting forth his name as the candidate for the position of president of the Central Committee, because of his good connections and experience in dealing with such groups, giving as an example the Judenrat of Zaglambia under his leadership. He preached to the local Jewish leaders, pointing out their flaws, promising to give them true orientation if they will allow him to lead them. It seems that local leaders regarded him with skepticism. Above all, his stature did not induce confidence for he was a small man, with mousy eyes and a distrustful smile. It could immediately be seen that he projected the image of a cheap careerist, a product of Jewish suffering and Jewish destruction. Dr. Feivl Viderman, a Jewish intellectual survivor and community leader from Bedzin, tells in his book Di Blonde Bestia about a meeting that took place in the Judenrat under the chairmanship of Moishe Merin where the latter reported on his visits to a number of Jewish centres and their liquidation. At that time he said, "You have heard that I and Frau Charney (who was his secretary and right hand person) have visited the largest Jewish centres so that we know exactly what is happening there. We have even been to Berlin and Prague and what we saw there can only be described as desperation. There is lacking a strong hand which can be effective in the difficult situation. The leaders of the German and Czech Jews lost their heads. The Jews there do not have any influence regarding the deportations. When I was there I reminded the leaders of their negative stand to my suggestion of a half year ago that we should establish one central body for all the Jewish communities in Germany and the annexed territories but they did not want to hear of it, all because of their dislike of Polish Jews. Today also they are against the establishment of a union of all communal bodies, fearing that the influence will fall into my hands, the hands of a Moishe Merin, a Polish Jew who does not have a good command of the German language, not trusting me to deal in their name with the Germans." Furthermore, he declared triumphantly, "Because of their faults, the German and Czech Jews are suffering so badly today. Today we need energetic, courageous new leaders because the former diplomacy has gone bankrupt and that explains my great success." He continued with a further argument saying, "That's how it is on the Western front, but it's no better in the East. There too, helplessness and desperation prevails. I foresee that in the near future all Jewish communities will be wiped out, and no sign of them will remain. That, meine Herren, is the result of false politics which the heads of the communities are practising: Rumkofsky in Lodz and Czerniakow in Warsaw with whom I can't come to terms. At a meeting with them, during my talk which lasted three hours, I could not convince them of the falsity of their approach and in the correctness of my politics. They did not want, or simply were not capable of understanding me. Because of this the sad consequences won't be long in coming."
This gives a clear picture of the general situation and the role of Moishe Merin which he took upon himself to play during the destruction of European Jewry. He tried to play the role of a "King of the Jews", as the Germans ironically called him. He wanted to go down in Jewish history as the chief liquidator of European Jewry. Moishe Merin behaved like a dictator. He did have a Judenrat which consisted of a few figures, but he didn't consider their opinions very much. He himself made all the decisions and they were merely his upholders, his servants who had to carry out all his decisions.
In the hands of Moishe Merin rested the fate of approximately 100,000 Jews of Zaglebie. He sent to death whomever he wanted to and whomever he wanted to, he temporarily let live. He was granted this privilege by his German patrons, for the price of serving them to liquidate the Jewish communities in Zaglebie. Everyone feared him and sought to please him and to play up to him. At one of the mass meetings which took place in the "Rialto" where he appealed to the population to come forward for the selection which was scheduled to take place at the city's sports stadium, one of the rabbis who was present called out, either because of wanting to find grace or because of stupidity, that we are fortunate that the Almighty sent us such a leader because "Since Moshe until Moshe there has not been one like Moishe."
Moishe Merin chose co-workers from various classes who were prepared to do whatever he commanded and with them he established the Judenrat. Mainly he sought people of a certain communal reputation and who were intellectuals, for the price of not being liquidated. He also had a number of spetzn (informers) who knew the city very well. They knew who had money, valuables and hidden goods. There were others who had connections with communal circles to bring him information about what was taking place in the city and in the underground movements. There was a young man from Bedzin who had a good position with him, a very handsome fellow who was very popular with women. This one was his "Officer of the Women". He brought for the "King of the Jews," the most beautiful women because what woman didn't need a small favour? One needed a place to live. Another needed a place to work. A third needed food items. A fourth wanted her dearest ones to be spared from deportation, so they were at the mercy of the "King of the Jews" and that got them favour with him. In cases where the woman happened to have a husband who stood in the way, he was quickly dispatched with the next group to forced labour.
CHAPTER 10
The problem of shelter in the ghetto
The problem of living quarters was very acute. After the ghetto had been established and its area more and more reduced, Jews were thrown out of their living quarters and were packed into small places where two, three and more families lived in the quarters where formerly only one family lived in the ghetto. Sanitary conditions were abhorrent. The aristocratic families were most affected because they were used to the greatest comfort. The one in charge of living quarters was, actually, a traditional Jew, Hersh Dovid Caiser. When he would be out on the street tens of people would run after him, pleading for a roof over their head or to move them elsewhere because they could not tolerate their neighbours. He was the one who could satisfy them through the grace of Merin or his closest co-workers. As a result, anyone who didn't have money or other means of bribing was in dire straits. When I had to give up my place on Mashtitzkiego right opposite the Agrudek, the city park, where the air was nice and fresh, I had a bitter taste in my mouth. It's true, I didn't have very much because I was a bachelor so I was a renter by the Grytzers. After much intervention I managed to get a bed in quarters with another bachelor, a young fellow, Schlesinger, whose family was liquidated a few weeks previously. The whole apartment of four rooms and a salon belonged to the Schlesinger family but after the family had been sent away the son was allowed only one room and the remainder was given to prominent people because it was centrally located on Targova Street not far from the Judenrat. In one room lived the chief of the Jewish police, Kleiner. In another room a red-haired tall girl, an appointee of the Judenrat, together with her family, and in the remaining room I lived with the bachelor. We all shared a corridor.
I pitied the young fellow. He was very young, seventeen perhaps, and left completely alone in the world. He suffered terribly. The sadness was spelled out in his face. He felt abandoned and endangered. He feared that he would also be sent off. He worked night shift in a shop and slept during the day. With each day he became thinner and paler. I tried to befriend him and boost his morale but he no longer trusted anyone. Once he came to me and asked for advice. Acquaintances, friends of his family, with pull, had arranged a position for him as a Jewish militia man. He asked me if he should accept the position. He placed me in a very difficult situation because I didn't know what to answer him. I, personally, felt that a Jew should not accept any position with the Germans and their Jewish servants. But, at the same time I could not take it upon myself to tell him to refuse because such advice might cause him to be sent away to his death. I, therefore, answered him that it is a personal matter, a matter of conscience which each one has to decide for himself.
The young fellow would not give up. He shoved me to the wall and asked me, "And if you had the opportunity would you accept such an offer?" This put me on the spot because I had already had such an opportunity and I categorically refused. I worked in my own shop where plate glass was made. There I was a stock keeper. The offices of the shop were on the same Targova Street at number 11. As a large shop which dealt with wagons of glass, dispatching wagons all the way to Russia, "a trusted one " I managed this shop. First it was a German from the neighbouring shtetl Swietochlowice, by the name of Poshled. Before the war, he was our customer who was a friend of mine. Later, when he became the commissioner of my shop he treated me with a certain politeness and respect. It was he who made the effort to make me the stock keeper and he provided me with a work card. Later he was replaced by another German of the area who came from Riga, a certain Palatzer. This one looked at me askew and wanted to get rid of me. When he discovered that I was the former owner of the shop he started to get scared, fearing that the war might possibly end quickly, with a defeat for the Germans, and that I would take the shop back from him. He had already invested capital in it. At first he didn't dare to do me wrong because I had once been the proprietor and now I was a poorly paid hired worker of minor importance, but afterward he decided that it was not a good idea for me to work there. I, naturally tried to please him, to be quick and conscientious. I also did the work of three hired ones because I had experience in this field. His glances started to cut me as with knives. I confided to my relatives and friends regarding my situation and sought their advice. I had a cousin in Sosnowiec whose mother, a sister of my mother, lived with her husband in Olkush, a shtetl approximately 80 kilometres from Sosnowiec. Their eldest son had married a girl whose sister was the wife of the Jewish police commissar. One day my uncle came to me with a suggestion that I should accept the position of Jewish militia man. He would use his influence, speak to his relative, the police commandant, to take me into the police work. I, upon hearing this suggestion, froze. I, a militia man! I would have to seize Jewish victims and supply them for the transports. I would be assisting the Germans and their Jewish servants. No way would I do that! My uncle, my aunt and their friends argued with me for hours, putting forth all kinds of suggestions. First of all, they said, I would be protected so that I wouldn't be sent away with the transports. The militiamen would be the last ones to be deported. Secondly, I would have food to eat and I would not starve from hunger. "Your present commissar will see to it," they continued, "that you be sent to be liquidated because you do not let him rest in peace, so why wait until it will be too late? Assure yourself of a safe position." Saying this, my aunt began to cry. Her own blood, a child of her eldest sister, how could she allow me to be deported with the transport to Auschwitz? I stood firm and said that I don't want to face such a trial, to have to force Jews to the transports and watch that they should not run away, only to save myself. I did not want to become a cruel Jew. But they tried to make me change my mind, arguing that a militia man does not have to be mean or cruel. It is possible to be a good militia man, they argued, one who helps people, helps them in their need and saves people. They worked on me for a whole week, but I did not allow myself to change my mind, so when the Schlesinger fellow asked me how I would behave in such a circumstance I concealed from him my experience and circumvented giving him a clear answer. The end was that he did accept the position and one day he appeared in a blue and white police hat with a stiff brim. The hat did not suit his face. His face was refined, pale, with a subtle smile which is in direct contrast to a law enforcer and chapper (grabber). To this day I do not know what happened to him because I was sometime later sent away with a transport and he remained in Sosnowiec.
